Just Some Dirty Conversations | Mental Poo

Monday, March 26, 2012

Just Some Dirty Conversations

So every once in a while I will go ahead and write a post for EdenFantasys which is an online sex store that sells sex toys and games and dice and - for some reason - books...because nothing says "LET'S GET OUR FREAK ON" like "please turn to chapter 3, the ins and outs of butt plugs."

Truer words? Never spoken.

Of course they have a Twitter account and a Facebook page so I'm all up in that but every once in a while we'll engage in some serious conversations about nookie and stuff about nookie and sometimes how our pets are involved in all this tomfoolery.

I may need professional help.




If you don't know what a 'Fleshlight' is I suggest you Google it in the privacy of your own home - which is preferably in the middle of the woods - in a darkened room with all the shades closed so no one can hear you say, "ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TELLING ME SOMEONE PUTS THEIR PENIS IN THAT FOR FUN?"

I own 3.




So there you go.

So if you're out of ideas on what to stick into an orifice or what is the best way to muffle your partner during sex or, you know, put your penis in some weird battery operated thing that looks like it belongs in a horror movie starring Kevin Bacon, you can buy all that stuff and more right here.

You're welcome, world. Now go get your freak on.

This post was sponsored by EdenFantasys.com.

Sex toys - EdenFantasys adult toys store


Peggy Sue Brister said...

SMH at you. Just SMH. =)

Carries Rambles said...

Those poor folks at Eden are not sure whether to compensate you for this post or compensate you too not write anymore.

C... said...

Damn jumper cables LOL

Unknown said...

Well I haven't used their store, but this will result in a click over, since I love the local sex store, and have supported her efforts to transform our bible belt puritan town into people that admit they have had sex more times than the number of children they have.

Unknown said...

That was hysterical! You so crack me up!!!

Bobbi said...

Great, now I have to go google fleshlight....

Pat said...

I think I just found me a new "Favorite".

jack mehoff said...

we cant say balls and clit on here....awe shit whoops!

busanalayali said...

This is a great posting I have read. I like your article..
busana muslim

Anonymous said...

I find this offensive! Which is exactly why I love it so much.

Ed said...

I admire your ability to Highjack peoples Facebook, Twitter, and comment posts without getting banned/blocked.

My hero.

Simone said...

best line ever: i have plenty of confidence. I just look like shit.

Shieldmaiden96 said...

It probably says a great deal about my neo-Puritan upbringing that THIS is what bothers me but... why isn't it spelled 'Fantasies'?

Related Posts with Thumbnails