Dear Jesus,
If you want to punish my son for this, please don't because this shit was totally my idea.
You can also blame Newbury Comics for stocking the thing in the first place.
You can't go into a store that stocks this kind of thing and then expect a guy to NOT make his 7 year old wear it and then pose for a picture while you send it to random people with the subject line: "IT'S A JESUS HAT!."
So awesome.
No offense.
Moog.
************************
UPDATE
I sent my ex-wife a picture of this to her phone.
Me: "LOOK! It's Cam in a JESUS MASK!"
Ex-Wife: "You better not."
First she nixes the Iron Maiden 'Killers' shirt and now this.
Jesus Christ.
And now he is all set to go *visi* that bank on the corner.
ReplyDelete^Visit. Visit, for crying out loud.
ReplyDeleteA mask like that has to give him an advantage at the Bethlehem ski jumping competition.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Jesus would feel honoured.
ReplyDelete...if my 14 year old could get his hands on a hat like that, he would wear it even in the house. We'd all be forced to "break bread" with fricken Jesus every night at the dinner table.
It's all fun and games until you barge in on the poor kid masturbating while wearing that thing. "And thou shalt have hairy palms!"
ReplyDeleteIf ONLY he had been wearing tap shoes at the time... the caption could have been Jesus Tap dancing Christ. You know what I say... if you're going to offend, don't half ass it!!
ReplyDeleteYeah, I would have made my kid try it on, too.
ReplyDeletehahahaha. so awesome. I bet you would be so fun to hang out with in the card aisle.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure Jesus would see the humor in the mask...he's got a pretty wicked sense of humor!
ReplyDeleteDo they have a Mary mask for your daughter? I would love to see that on the slopes.
ReplyDeleteGreat! Now headlines can say "Jesus robs liquor store." Who comes up with these things?
ReplyDeleteNow when people say they saw Jesus it makes it a lot harder on shrinks - were they really hallucinating, having a dellusion of grandeur, having a miracle, or did they just see your kid? That extra option in there makes things so much harder to diagnose..... LMAO
ReplyDeleteWell that Jesus hat looks nice and warm. I mean it IS winter. Nothing warms the head (and soul) better than Jesus on your head, surely? :) There's a "Jesus is sitting on my face" joke in there somewhere if you're more vulgar than I.
ReplyDeleteBut the question is, can he solemn down hill with his arms out wide?
ReplyDeleteJesus Christ! It's...Jesus Christ.
ReplyDeleteIf that doesn't renew one's faith in the Lord, then I don't know what will.
Sorry, did I say the Lord? I meant Beelzebub.
OMG!! lol
ReplyDeleteWas this what the song "What if God was one of us?" was about?
ReplyDeleteTry not to use him for evil, Joseph.
I was going to reply to everyone here individually but then I got lazy and decided not to because it IS Wednesday, after all.
ReplyDeleteI am totally buying him this thing, though. SO amazing.
that photo is friggen priceless!
ReplyDeleteMy Lutheran upbringing commands me to be offended. But it's just too awesome. I can't do it.
ReplyDeleteAHHH! Zombie Jesus is attacking!
ReplyDeleteWhen I took an art history class with my sister in high school (wow...that sounds like the beginning of a Dear Penthouse Forum article)...she altered a picture in our books titled "Christ in Limbo" by drawing a horizontal line across the page and re-titling it "christ DOING the limbo" -- perhaps you should have your son do the limbo while wearing this?
ReplyDeletehey if jesus didn't want that mask made he would've just had Zeus send some lightning bolts down at the guy trying to make it...
ReplyDeletethat's how it works right?
Once again I'm glad I live a state away, so I won't be too close when the lightning strikes!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE NEWBURY COMICS
ReplyDeleteJesus hat = Awesome.
ReplyDeleteI need one of those. It looks just like him.
ReplyDeleteYeah, wow, to the hat and all..BUT the thing that made my eyes pop out is that you and your exwife still can laugh and talk and exchange phone pix.
ReplyDeleteYou're more awesome than that paper burglar guy...
Funniest shit I have ever seen!! LOL, I may just have to buy one and rob a liquor store (stealing all the wine of course).
ReplyDeleteIs there something wrong with me that I immediately wonder about the person trying to describe her attempted rapist, rather than a liquor store robber?
ReplyDeleteThis totally makes up for the Buddha drawer pulls I once saw.
ReplyDeletemary magdalene is totally going to try and jump his bones. way to pimp out your pre-pubescent kid.
ReplyDeleteThat ski mask is further proof to help me convince people that sweet, sweet blasphemy is indeed a worthwhile and fun activity.
ReplyDeleteDid they have a Muhammad mask? Now wearing that shit would be daring. And your ex-wife would be begging you to get him the Jesus mask instead.
ReplyDelete