There is this one Facebook "Uncle" who keeps trying to friend me over and over and over. I accepted one time and then he sent me a ridiculously lecherous email so now I have to be very careful where I comment for fear of this "Uncle" trying to get in my pants.
I recognize that pooping something sharp face. I make it at least once a week. Apparently a regular diet of beer and pills makes your shit all rough around the edges.
I am proud to say I am your Friend on FB. I am also a little bit glad (and a whole lot of disappointed.. what?! I'm bipolar shut up!) that you haven't commented on anything I've posted.
I laughed at the MySpace kid and yeah I won't let my kids play with him either.
OMG OMG Blogger just ate all my individual responses to all of you so please replace this comment with something hilarious that you would share with your grandkids..you know..when they turn 18, of course.
Because you inspired me, I am now listed as a "friend" for the local FOX affiliate. It's actually a lot of fun chiming in with whatever strikes me as funny. Imitation is the sincerest form of plagiarism, I guess.
Great. Now I can actually picture myself trying to think up clever or stupid status updates on Facebook in the hopes you'll make them worthy of your blog.
I would like to thank you the hours you've spared me. You have brought the best of facebook right here and now I can avoid all those lecherous, time sucking BORING friends.
My employer blocks facebook at work, which means it takes twice as long for me to go through "friend" statuses on my phone.
ReplyDeleteHAHAHA! So this is what I've been missing out on FB!!
ReplyDeleteI almost couldn't read the rest after the Sara Jessica horse years/Saturday night special...
Are you insured?
Wee! I can stalk you on Facebook. Sweet.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I know. The link has been there forever. I only read what I want to. And I lack concentration periodically.What?
Lol those are awesome. I'm going to friend you just for the entertainment value I could get on a daily basis. My FB friends are boring!
ReplyDelete-->I'm already your Facebook "friend" and even suggested my friend Kim K. find you too just to laugh at your posts.
ReplyDeleteThe MySpace one in this post made me laugh.
~deb
The 'horsehead' comment has me in tears from laughing so hard. I wonder if he entices her with sugar cubes?
ReplyDeleteI need to start writing on facebook more so I can get your lovely comments.
ReplyDeleteall funny, i like the crayons one lol
ReplyDeletenobodys that funny in my friends list
I'm so going to friend request you.
ReplyDeleteMy luck? You'll deny it.
I'm a loser.
And yet I keep coming back to read your blog...
ReplyDeleteThere is this one Facebook "Uncle" who keeps trying to friend me over and over and over. I accepted one time and then he sent me a ridiculously lecherous email so now I have to be very careful where I comment for fear of this "Uncle" trying to get in my pants.
ReplyDeleteEW!
OMG when you poop something hard! LMAO
ReplyDeleteAnd now I can find you!!! Ha ha!
ReplyDeleteFrankly I can't see any other reason for Facebook to even exist. Well done as always.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the "pooping something sharp" thing made me LOL like a trucker.
Knight,
ReplyDeleteHe GIVES it away -not a very good businesswhore. MAN, businessMAN.
There are some priceless gems there. I can tell I don't spend enough time on facebook!
ReplyDeleteHow do YOU know what goes on in the Broderick/horsehead household on Saturday nights?
ReplyDeleteAre you perv'in outside their windows? And for a short guy, isn't it kinda dangerous holding on to their ivy trellis with your one free hand?
First of all, my lovely friend Eva (see above) is quite possibly the first person to ever say she doesn't "spend enough time on Facebook."
ReplyDeleteAnd the "I wanna watch" bit was hilarious.
Moooooog, you've taken Facebook to a whole new level.
I'm not sure that's a compliment.
buahahah, no one is safe.
ReplyDeleteI'm so honored to be included in your post. {Neigh, snort snort}
ReplyDeleteI recognize that pooping something sharp face. I make it at least once a week. Apparently a regular diet of beer and pills makes your shit all rough around the edges.
ReplyDeleteMade my day better. Infinitely. Excellent, as always.
ReplyDeleteThese are my favorite posts.
ReplyDeleteFacebook at your own risk should your tag line
I am proud to say I am your Friend on FB. I am also a little bit glad (and a whole lot of disappointed.. what?! I'm bipolar shut up!) that you haven't commented on anything I've posted.
ReplyDeleteI laughed at the MySpace kid and yeah I won't let my kids play with him either.
This is how Facebook Should be used!
I think your friends might be a bit more exciting than mine??
ReplyDeleteHill Larry Us.
ReplyDeleteHaha! MySpace + JSP's horse face = Awesome!
ReplyDeleteThis is far more tame than our discussion on anal beads...that was you, right? ;)
ReplyDeleteThose are priceless--again you prove your superior sense of humor!
ReplyDeleteSometimes the smart ass comments just can't go WITHOUT being posted. They must. be. posted.
ReplyDeletewww.alotoflayers.blogspot.com
OMG OMG Blogger just ate all my individual responses to all of you so please replace this comment with something hilarious that you would share with your grandkids..you know..when they turn 18, of course.
ReplyDeleteThanks in advance.
I really need more interesting FB friends... THIS just confirms it..lol
ReplyDeleteBecause you inspired me, I am now listed as a "friend" for the local FOX affiliate. It's actually a lot of fun chiming in with whatever strikes me as funny. Imitation is the sincerest form of plagiarism, I guess.
ReplyDeleteI hate Facebook.
ReplyDeleteBut I adore you.
Hmmm . . . any way you can just mock me via email?
Get on that.
these are too funny. I think I like the one about Sarah Jessica Parker the best!
ReplyDeleteGreat. Now I can actually picture myself trying to think up clever or stupid status updates on Facebook in the hopes you'll make them worthy of your blog.
ReplyDeleteI'd be in terrible danger of getting work (and house cleaning and exercising and showering) if not for Facebook and Blogger.
ReplyDeleteHoly Shit you are HILARIOUS! I need friends like you on FB!
ReplyDeleteIf I remember the Social Network correctly, this is exactly what Zuckerberg had in mind that late night at Harvard.
ReplyDeleteI would like to thank you the hours you've spared me. You have brought the best of facebook right here and now I can avoid all those lecherous, time sucking BORING friends.
ReplyDeleteThis is an anonymous comment, right?
I am beyond pissed off that I was not featured in this post. WEEKEND RUINED.
ReplyDeleteI added you as a friend on Facebook. If you don't accept I'll be heartbroken.
ReplyDelete