As a lifeguard for most of my teen years and much of my adult life - this is the STUPIDEST approximation of CPR ever. You may as well just hover over the person while blowing in their face watching them turn blue waiting for an ambulance to show up.
I find it ironic that with all you have done at work, trying to do CPR is what would have gotten you canned. They would have to take down the surveillance cameras and everything!
When I was an RA in college I kinda hoped somebody would sorta die so that I could use all that freaking training I had to do. I actually wished (yes I know it is wrong) that somebody would fully die so I could use the shock paddles. That shit looked fun and I trained for it...so hell why not. Only downside was they had to have no pulse for the paddles to activate...freaking rules and fail safes. Ugh.
As a lifeguard for most of my teen years and much of my adult life - this is the STUPIDEST approximation of CPR ever. You may as well just hover over the person while blowing in their face watching them turn blue waiting for an ambulance to show up.
ReplyDeleteYou cracked me up, again!
ReplyDeleteAren't you already an expert at most "hands-only" methods?
ReplyDeleteHAH! That was great. And where were you when I was choking to death at work the other day?? I could've used you banging on my chest!
ReplyDeleteI'd figure your HR department would already be aware of your inappropriate touching.
ReplyDeleteI find it ironic that with all you have done at work, trying to do CPR is what would have gotten you canned. They would have to take down the surveillance cameras and everything!
ReplyDeleteHilarious as always. And Ed's comment is CRACKING me the hell up!
ReplyDeleteWell, it seems you've now kind of covered it in your blog.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was an RA in college I kinda hoped somebody would sorta die so that I could use all that freaking training I had to do. I actually wished (yes I know it is wrong) that somebody would fully die so I could use the shock paddles. That shit looked fun and I trained for it...so hell why not. Only downside was they had to have no pulse for the paddles to activate...freaking rules and fail safes. Ugh.
ReplyDelete