If You Don't Know Me by Now..... | Mental Poo

Friday, July 23, 2010

If You Don't Know Me by Now.....


I was sitting at work the other morning which is actually more than I USUALLY do because sitting requires focus to maintain balance (which is why I eat a hearty breakfast!) and pretty much the only thing I'm focused on at work is covering my tracks to make sure my Internet browsing doesn't cause my dismissal.

*wipes sweat from brow

So I'm sitting there and all of a sudden my Yahoo Messenger window pops up.

That's what she said.

I have no idea who this woman is that's IM'ing me.

Apparently this feeling is mutual.

And this, people, is why you should add me to your Yahoo Messenger list...

...and then years later forget who the Hell I am.

(click image to enlarge)


Well..I don't know who this chick is but apparently she doesn't like Everest-climbing pimp midgets.

Racist.

I'm going to call her out during Zumba class.

Moog out.

48 comments:

Mom, Wife, Nina said...

HAHAHAHAAA!!!!! That was a short conversation. ;)

Mike said...

OR you could call her out at your next NAMBLA meeting. Not that her being female would make her stand out anyways.

WILLIAM said...

Zumba classes are a requirement to become a sherpa.

MommaKiss said...

AIA?
problems. Serious problems.
also - feel free to delete me from any chat list I'm on. There are certain things that do not need to be screen capped. Thank You.

Christina_the_wench said...

People still use Yahoo Messenger? I had no idea. Maybe it's just the Zumba, AIA, NAMBLA crowd. I need to broaden my horizons apparently.

Dorn said...

That's great. Sherpas can definitely be overly sensitive, probably should have eased into the prostitution a little slower.

What's AIA? Sadly I kept up on the other references. Thanks for making me feel fit and dirty.

Brutalism said...

You know, when I first started reading your blog, I THOUGHT you looked familiar. We totally belong to the same organizations. (And you really rock the spandex in Zumba!)

I'm also a life member of NRA and a member of PETA (this part is true) -- which reminds me that I'm none too happy about you and that hamster.

I guess I'd be happier if you just wanted to shoot it?

This is why I don't get politics.

ClevelandPoet said...

sherpa have such bad memories.

Funnyrunner said...

how odd...

Quirkyloon said...

Zumba?

Come on now. You expect anybody believe that?

Zumba. Yeah right.

Eva Gallant said...

It may have been a mistake to mention the male prostitution thing. that can be a turn off for some ladies.

Jen said...

She stayed a lot longer than I thought she would. This is classic!

Moooooog35 said...

Nina: Kinda can't blame her, really.

Mike: Good point.

I mean, um...I don't know what you're talking about.

William: No. You're thinking Pilates.

Momma: TOO LATE. You're next Friday's post.

Christina: Just when I think I can't possibly feel any older...

Dorn: AIA = Anal Intruders Anonymous.

Nice way to play coy.

Brutalism: PETA? Really? I mean, I'm all for the ethical treatment of animals but sometimes they just piss you off, you know?

Maybe not.

Cleveland: You tibet your life they do.

Thank you. I'm here all week.

Funnyrunner: wait..which part?

Quirky: HAHAHAHA. Sad that that's the organization you find unbelievable.

So. Sad.

Eva: I was hedging my bets there.

At some point it has to pay off, right?

RIGHT?!

Moooooog35 said...

Jen: I can say that about most women.

Sadly.

Stephanie Meade Gresham said...

i met my husband through a messenger conversation like this one only less mt. everesty and more sock-puppet porny.

i'm not kidding. we're married now. it's awkward.

Coffeypot said...

You had a lot of Sherpa’s because they were carrying you up the mountain. At least that's the way I would do it.

Stefanie said...

She clearly has no sense of adventure.

Also? Next time could you put that "click image to enlarge" message ABOVE the photo? (I'm not that smart.)

Deray said...

JAJAJAJAJAJAJA good way to start my friday, thanks for the laugh midget pimp! JAJAJAJAJAJAJA

Ed said...

That's exactly how I treat messenger hecklers who pretend they don't know me. Threaten them with midget anal sherpa sex while climbing Mt.Everest in a hypoxia-like state followed by Zumba class fucking. Then charging them for it.
That shit straightens them out every time!

pattypunker said...

ya know i was just saying "i love when my yahoo messenger pops up."

Heather said...

I wish I had met my husband thru internet sock puppet porn! That would have been awesome!

You went too far with Zumba. That's just too hard to believe...

Don said...

You are certain to get a bj from that girl. I mean with your superb "come on" and all. Sexy stud you!

Moooooog35 said...

Stephanie: Are you sure it's not me?

Sounds like a familiar story.

Coffey: Yes..in their backpacks.

Stefanie: 'click image' has now been moved.

Picky. Jesus.

Deray: FYI, you misspelled 'hahahaha'

You're welcome.

Ed: It's like we're brethren.

Patty: Me too. Except it wasn't about messenger.

Heather: I know..I should have backed off on the Zumba. Maybe yoga? No idea.

Don: Dad?

The Vegetable Assassin said...

Damn, I thought it might have been ME up until the Zumba class thing (I do my Zumba at home...)

steff said...

only sex-perverts use instant messenger anymore.

which, in your case, makes perfect sense.

go get 'em, tiger!

Chris@Knucklehead! said...

You do, of course, realize that The Everest-Climbing Pimp Midgets must be booked for the next Mental Poo-looza, right?

Chris@Knucklehead! said...

And you need to get a T-shirt that reads "Click to Enlarge". How funny would THAT be?

Alex said...

Ha ha ha, f*ck you're funny. I'll have to try that for all my facebook friend requests. Freaks are coming out of everywhere.

Sunny said...

geez I hate when I have to start over... I think the first time I tried to comment I said that I'm totally going to add you as a friend on messenger cuz I only have one friend on there and he's stupid.

Exactly how do you cover your tracks at work because I could SO be fired? But it should practically be required for me to waste my time surfing blogs with excessive cursing, reading vibrator reviews and updating my blog, facebook and my bank accounts. I'm in an office by myself for fucks sake!

Maxie said...

how much do you charge?

The Sweetest said...

Funny, because this morning got a Yahoo invite from someone I don't know. I just ignored it.

Moooooog35 said...

Veggie: You sure it wasn't?

I mean..you SURE you're SURE?

Steff: Um...

Thanks?

Chris: HA.

DONE:

http://www.cafepress.com/MentalPoo.390782733

Alex: Awww. thank you.

*blushes, curtsies, then runs away

Sunny: Two words:

Private. Browsing.

(Tool menu on your browser...GO...GO QUICKLY)

Maxie: For you or for the general public?

*prices vary

Sweetest: ..and now you know better.

You're welcome.

Didactic Pirate said...

You'd think she'd show a little more respect to the president of the United States. WHO, it turns out, is into zumba.

Laurie said...

Brilliant.

Thanks for that. I needed it today.

Mrsblogalot said...

HAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Betcha she writes you again.

You have a way.

Becky..AMHW said...

I had to stop using my messenger under absentmindedhousewife.

People were IMing me, knowing where I live, and asking if we could get together for drinks...and maybe they could pay me for sex.

It was happening on Myspace too.

Do I write like a prostitute?


Don't answer that.

Amanda said...

Wow!

What a coincidence!

My husband is a member of NAMBLA too.

sammy said...

wow thats amazing. i love messing with solicitors when they call the house line. i mean its the least i can do. its gotta get boring after about the, oh i dont know, 3rd outgoing call!

so basically im doing them a favor...you're welcome

Malach the Merciless said...

Wow, that's how I talk to telemarketers

Jori said...

Totally the first time I've commented on your blog. But I thought you should know that I may be slightly drunk and the first thing I typed into the address bar was midgetmanofstill.com.

I think this is the universe telling you that you need to start making bathtub moonshine.

Moooooog35 said...

Didactic: No one else does..why start now?

Laurie: You're welcome. I thought of you the entire time I wrote it.

no idea.

Mrsblogalot: I DO have a way. I'm just not sure with what.

Becky:

*whistles

Amanda: Um.

K.

Sammy: I make up a language when they call.

Malach: See 'sammy' comment

Jori: I live in an apartment now. I have no idea what was in that bathtub before I got here.

I think I'll pass.

Tracie said...

I'll bet the ladies in your Zumba class loooove you!

nonamedufus said...

When I read that I thought it was a guy. Ha, ha. Don't bend over climbing Mt Everest!

Rebekah Mae said...

Hahah This used to happen to me on AIM. Only the conversation went more like this.

Random person: Hi, Do I know you?

Me: Uh I don't know.

RP: Oh...okay.

Me: yeah, okay....*awkward silence*

RP: I REMEMBER YOU NOW!...So...Can I see you naked?

Me:NO! THE FUCK?!

RP: Then can we cyber? *touches your boobs* ;)

Me: THE HELL?! NO!

(ME has signed off of AIM)

*sigh*

meleah rebeccah said...

Okay, now THAT was absolutely hilarious!

The Demigoddess said...

I choked on my coffee. Damn you, midgetmanofsteel! Hahaha. Can't stop laughing........................................................................................................................................................................... Still can't...stop...laughing....

A Vapid Blonde said...

Pretty sure she was a Grand Wizard or something which is why she signed out when you revealed that you are Barack Obama.

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