Push Start vs. Pull Start | Mental Poo

Monday, November 17, 2008

Push Start vs. Pull Start

Yet another shining example of why I won't win a Noble Peace Prize.

At least in the Middle East.

Here is an IM conversation I had the other day with my buddy John.

Please, people - no Jihads.

Thanks in advance.

If you hate intolerance of other cultures, you might want to skip this.

I think I failed that class.

Probably because the teacher had a f*cking accent.

(we were in the middle of talking about working out)

midgetmanofsteel: so, I'm doing wrist curls with the olympic bar, kneeling over a bench (forearms on the bench, wrists over)

midgetmanofsteel: ..and they're starting to cramp up...so I drop the bar the 6 inches or whatever on my last rep.

midgetmanofsteel: I stand up, and this Indian guy is rushing over to me all frantic looking.

John: lol

midgetmanofsteel: I'm, like, "hey..what's up?"

midgetmanofsteel: he's like, "OH - I HEARD A BIG BANG!! YOU OKAY?"

midgetmanofsteel: um..yeah. I'm okay.

thanks, Mahatma.

John: lol

John: did he smell bad?

midgetmanofsteel: OHMYGOD

John: they all do at my gym

John: it's nasty

midgetmanofsteel: he was in the locker room BEFORE he went into the gym and smelled like he'd just run all the way from Bangalore.

John: had the italian sub smell going?

midgetmanofsteel: lol

midgetmanofsteel: yep

John: nasty isn't it

midgetmanofsteel: god - really nasty.

John: I might have to keep a can of Axe body spray on me so I can hose them down

midgetmanofsteel: What?! Then the chicks will be all over them!

John: true

John: I would've said, I dropped this weight due to this foul smell

John: it has just gotten really strong, any idea what it is?

John: don't you have some suicide vest to wear or something?

midgetmanofsteel: LOL - I think that role's delegated to the Al Qaeda guy we got in here.

midgetmanofsteel: seriously - you're working in a computer lab. you need to wear the f*cking towel?

midgetmanofsteel: Christ, I don't go around wearing my First Communion suit.

John: lol



A discussion about working out digresses into a diatribe about how smelly Indian people can be.

Somehow, I don't think I'd make a very good Democrat.

Oh - by the way...

...the title of this?

It's the punchline to this part of the IM conversation:


John: dude you know the difference between a dot head and towel head?

midgetmanofsteel: no - what?


Now you know.

I'm getting a Jihad, aren't I?

I knew it.


Diva's Thoughts said...

You are so wrong on so many levels. lol

The Absent Minded Housewife said...

I smell like beef vegetable soup.

Poetry Sue said...

Ack.... must escape stench... oh wait... thats just you MOOOGman

Mike said...

When I lived in Toronto, I worked out at a Gym in richmond hill.

Richmond Hill is the home of rich itallian people.

The gym was oversold.

The ... b.o. was so think in there you could fucking see it.


LBluca77 said...

I stopped going to the gym once the people that worked out next to me started smelling like salami. Not that I don't like salami, but just not when it is used as an aftershave.

Moooooog35 said...

Tee: You sound like my sex-ed teacher.

Becky: Is this why Hindu's won't eat you?

Poetry: Compared to this guy, I smell like heaven. When I say 'heaven', I mean 'Scarlett Johannson.'

Mike: That wasn't b.o. That was 'essence de bada-bing.'

lbluca: Word is that you love salami. Don't blame me, it's just what I've heard. You know..when I say it out loud to myself.

Hungry Mother said...

I smelled something nasty in Bad Ass Coffee today and found that it was my armpits. I'll bet all of the Indians in the place were talking about the way those Irish guys smell.

Rahul said...

I apologize for all Indian people.

No I don't.

HeyJoe said...

"First Communion Suit." lol.

Perhaps along with whatever other brochures immigrants are given (rules of the road, how we vote, etc) perhaps they should receive bathing and deodorant application instructions.

Knight said...

Oh wow. If I believed in hell I would be seeing you there.

GeologyJoe said...

is it the curry? i don't know. people from India in Maine pretty rare.

AngryMan said...

Instant messaging . . . Excessive use of LOL . . . Is Moooog a 13 year old girl???

Malach the Merciless said...

You sir are racist . .

thank you please come again!

Moooooog35 said...

Hungry: Irish guys smell like stew!

Rs27: Nice waffling. Gandhi would be ashamed. ASHAMED!

HeyJoe: Immigrants get brochures?!?

Knight: I'll tell Rachael Ray you say 'hi.'

GeoJoe: Maine is the New Delhi.

Angry: Yes. I'm a 13 year old girl. By the way..that knock on your door is the Feds.

Malach: I'm not a racist. My car doesn't go fast at all.

Anonymous said...

I never have IM conversations THAT funny.

Anonymous said...


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