Pokemon's Trainer Gets an IPhone! | Mental Poo

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Pokemon's Trainer Gets an IPhone!

Oh joy!

I get out of doing another post!!

Today, I have the honor of having PkmnTrainerJ on the Mental Poo Casting Couch.

I have no idea what 'PkmnTrainerJ' actually stands for.

I'm guessing it's some code for:

1) Jay, Pokemon Trainer
2) Jay pokes men on trains...er (he does Ted Kennedy impressions)
3) Fucked if I know

Whatever. I'm tired of thinking about it.

If YOU want to do a guest spot, all you have to do is:

1) show up
2) send me a decent post about anything
3) toss my salad and call me a well-hung bitch

#2 is the only requirement.

However, I'll really pimp your shit if you can swing #3.

If you do the little swirly thing with your pinky while you're in there, like PkmnTrainerJ did, you get bonus points. **

** Bonus points mean nothing

Thanks in advance.

Without further ado, I bring you PkmnTrainerJ's guest post!

Hey Moog,

This is my attempt at a guest post.

Okay, I'll try this, though I did blog about it a bit, I feel I should expand.


So, back in January, I decided to be a smug bastard and get myself an iPhone.

My old phone was beyond recovery, so it was a nice excuse.

Being how people are with iPhones, I was showing off, laughing at other people's shit phones and generally being a cock in retrospect.

Then I had had it for four days and then somehow managed to do this to it:

Before you ask, I have no idea how this happened.

I work in a shop. Boring shit.

This makes it look like I work in a fucking quarry or something.

I was checking on my phone in the work's bathroom (um...not taking pictures of my penis or anything...ahem) so I swore quite loudly and frequently when I saw this.

I spent the rest of my shift swearing under my breath, and wondering what the hell to do and staying out of annoying customers' way.

Read: all my customers.

I hate you all.

Especially you, Len.

"That'll be fou...ucking hell. I mean, four pounds."

I rang Apple from my iPhone, which still worked. I just cut myself on the glass every time I touched the screen.

Yes. The phone call cut my damn ear.

Had to send them the photo you see above for them to assess the damage.

This was apparently enough of a matter for me to speak to a senior technician about it, and have to use his e-mail to send the pictures to.

Maybe he wanted the penis pic...NO! I TOLD YOU THERE WEREN'T ANY!

Got an appointment booked for a repair at the "Genius Bar" at the Apple Store.

I headed there before work. The Apple guy looked at my iPhone, stuck it in a drawer behind him, and then brought out a brand new one. iPhone data was backed up so it was like I just had a fixed phone.

No charge either, because I'd had the phone less than 14 days. In fact, I'm going to play JellyCar on it now. Let me just grab-

Oh shit.

"Hey Apple. Yeah. It happened again...."


Thanks, Pkmn!


Shit like this is why my cell phone has a rotary dial and may or may not actually be a toy.

Technology is for losers.

Check out Pkmn's site.

Maybe one of you can figure out what the fuck that name means.

Let me know. Thanks in advance.

Moog out.


Want to do a guest post for me?

Shoot me an email here and let me know


Anonymous said...


Is that guy your long lost brother or something?


Check his iphone to see if he's as *ahem* well hung as you and we'll know for sure.

Regardless, when I want more moog and none is to be had, I'm going over there.

Christina_the_wench said...

This should happen to all IPhone owners. Bastards with cool shit...

No, I'm not bitter. Why do you ask?

Blonde Goddess said...

Moog...you're a pervert. A short sexy pervert.

I appreciate the gourd picture.
I never thought about using a gourd before but ya know..they're all bumpy and ridged and stuff.

Moooooog35 said...

Mike: I edit all guest posts for flow, content, and then add pictures.

It's like the company that redid your resume:

Mike's Original: "I'm borderline special needs and, OOH! Caterpillar!"

Resume redone: "I willing to learn new things. Special interests include entymology."


Christina: I have really cool shit.

Oh. You're talking technology.


BG: No problem.

A related question:

What the Hell are you talking about?

Blonde Goddess said...

I'm talking about the gourds on those African tribal guys.
And don't even tell me you weren't looking there...

Venom said...

Jut wth are those dudes trying to imply with those obviously exaggerated 'member covers'?
Do they want us to believe they are capable of impregnating giraffes or something?

rachaelgking said...

Nonetheless, I'd still give my left boob for one of those things.

PkmnTrainerJ said...

Wait, all those bonus points got me nothing?

Clearly this means I need to earn more of them.

Anonymous said...

Borderline special needs?

Please bitch. I'm all the way there ;)

Anonymous said...

This sorta stuff always happens to me, like when I got my iPod and 2 hours later its scratched up like I threw it down a garbage disposal as soon as I got it and fished it out later. I also do this with Digital cameras. It's like technology hates me.

Moooooog35 said...

BG: Oh. Those gourds. No. Wasn't looking.

* whistling

Venom: Actually, they can bang giraffes. I have the video.

Hold on. The authorities are at my door.

LiLu: I've said it before and I'll say it again:

Just say no to the uniboob.

Pkmn: I'll bring the lube.

Malach: I'm calling you now. PICK UP YOUR PEAS!

Mike: I was trying to be nice. See if I do that again.

Allanah: I'd reply here, but I fear your computer is now just a pile of ashes.

Anonymous said...

Nice job 'PkmnTrainerJ'

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