Cue the "Jaws" Music | Mental Poo

Monday, August 30, 2010

Cue the "Jaws" Music

I got this text from my ex the other day:

"Cam's New Goggles."

I open the picture to find this:


So I'm guessing when he swims around with that thing on it looks like this:



That's SO COOL unless it happens in that scene from "Jaws" where the kids have the cardboard fin and they pop out of the water and there are, like, 20 boats around them and all these rifles are pointed at them and let's all thank Christ here that Dick Cheney wasn't on one of those boats because we'd be looking at two dead kids clutching a cardboard fin and one Hell of a lawsuit from the Actor's Guild.

That's right.

Dick Cheney could have been the downfall of Stephen Spielberg.

You heard it here first, people.




Where was I?

Oh.

GOGGLES.

So now I'm all thinking what ELSE could we put on the top of these goggles?!?

Some thoughts:



..because nothing says 'funny' like a drowning.

Or this:



This is on or around the time I get angry emails from the people washing ducks.

Or..for the retro crowd:



That last set of goggles also comes with accessories!!



Hm.

Maybe we'll just stick with the shark ones.

Those are cool, too.

28 comments:

Mrsblogalot said...

Man I hope HBO picks you up soon.

Before those "other" people pick you up first (-:

Elly Lou said...

Can you whip up a set with a BabyRuth on the top for those kids swimming in public pools?

Eva Gallant said...

Definitly disturbed!

The Absence of Alternatives said...

Your boy is so cute!

Ok wrt. ideas for goggles... how about a set that shows a killer whale breaching? Preferably this particular killer whale?

http://theladyslounge.com/majestic-indeed

pattypunker said...

aw hell how about giant used hypodermic needle goggles?

Miss Yvonne said...

I need to pick up that shark mask to wear at work. I'm trying to build up my case for some short-term mental health leave.

Midwestern Mama Holly said...

Okay... I laughed at the Kennedy, Chappaquiddick goggles. Complete with Ted head!

Mike said...

What about the poop on the goggles? Surprised you didn't go there.

Antonia Blanca said...

LOL - very creative post! Hilarious!

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

i think it's 'cue' the jaws music

who are you going to believe?

the librarian english major or me

the out of work poli sci major

Brutalism said...

"Oh my God. I think that's Richard" should become a new catch phrase:

(Passing a traffic accident): "Oh my God. I think that's Richard."

(Seeing someone on COPS being whisked away in handcuffs): "Oh my God. I think that's Richard."

(Tasting soup at a fancy restaurant): "Oh my God. I think that's Richard."

Think of the fun!

Chris said...

The Chappaquiddick goggles cracked me up.

And yes, it's "cue" the Jaws music. We've told you that before.

Queue: to line up, or a line as in "the queue to the ladies room at the Metallica concert was half a mile long."

Jen said...

Nooo! He needs frickin' laser beams on his head! ; )

Pat said...

I can dig the shark goggles. Ain't no way I'm going in the water anyway! Scare those other people!

Moooooog35 said...

mrsblogalot: I doubt they'll pick me up. I'm strangely heavier than I appear.

Elly:

*slaps head and says "DOH!"

Eva: Like you expect less?

Absence: Yes. Putting a giant whale penis on my son's head sounds like a great idea.

???

Patty: SO MANY GREAT IDEAS!

Miss Yvonne: If they don't know it by now..not sure what else would help.

Midwestern: You're welcome.

Mike: It's not all about poop, Mike. Not all about poop.

Antonia: Gracias!!

Kelly: Ugh. FINE.

Brutalism: OH MY GOD, I THINK IT'S RICHARD!!

You're right. It works EVERYWHERE.

Chris: damn me and my attempts at overachieving!

Jen: That sounds dangerous.

DONE.

Pat: Don't be so hard on yourself. You don't need to be in the water for that.

Kidding. I kid.

It's what I do.

Malach the Merciless said...

I like how the ex. edited the photo so you wouldn't see her new boyfriend, damn bitches!

Patricia ~ The Naked Writer said...

lol this was a treat for me today to read this post! thanks for that...it has been one hell of a crappy day but not anymore :o)

NEATO BURRITO said...

haha... Ill make sure when i go a get some new googles that I get the car. I like the shark one... but, you knowww, dont wanna get shot by dick.

Neato Burrito

Leiah

Jen said...

OMG! Chappaquiddick? You went there!

Anji said...

Don't you have a real job to go to?

Becky..AMHW said...

Um. I thought of a big glittery dildo. The kind with a little flop to 'em. With veins.

I'm not nice. That's OK though. I've got a sense of style and a couple self help books.

Pearl said...

How about helicopter blades? Nothing says "I'm fun" like the ability to walk around saying "whop whop whop whop whop" and pretending to be a helicopter!

Pearl

SisterMerryHellish said...

Shark fin goggles. Are those what hammerhead sharks put on to look more normal or are they like beer goggles for other sharks so hammerheads look more appealing at the end of the night?

MommaKiss said...

Love the BP one. But then again, I like things slick.

meleah rebeccah said...

Seriously, your son is so cute!

Busted Kate said...

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! Hilarious! Shark kicks ass but drowning man is my favorite.

Sunny said...

Nothing has caused my family more grief in the water than a log. "is that a log?" "I don't know, looks like foam." "Is it a dead fish?" "No, I think it's just some weeds." CRASH! "Oh shit, log."

So, I vote for log goggles, log, log, log, log." Crap, where do I know that from? Was that on Adult Swim or something? During Ren & Stimpy? Geez I hate getting old.

That one girl said...

Drowning goggles might be the funniest thing I've ever seen!

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