Shit I Forgot to Write About - The Beastiality Halloween Party | Mental Poo

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Shit I Forgot to Write About - The Beastiality Halloween Party

I came across another photo that I took when I was coming up with ideas for posts but then never got around to actually writing them so, you know, enjoy.

This one was for a Halloween Party we had at work.

I have to be honest with you, I'm pretty antisocial when it comes to 'people' and 'being nice and courteous' but our workplace throws a kickass Halloween Party so who am I to deny myself free pizza - even if it involves being near a bunch of awkward software developers who can't make eye contact with anything moving.

But what topped off this year's party were promotion posters for it in the building that showed THIS:

dog mounting a horse
Um.

Is this supposed to be an 'after hours' thing?

So of course, like, 2 minutes after the posters go up I get an IM from my friend and coworker, Kristin:

Kristin: "I don't know what kind of party this is going to be, but I'M GOING."

No shit.

Because I'm not sure how you DON'T go and see a bulldog banging a miniature horse.

I don't care WHO you are, this is 'bucket list' shit right here, my friends.

funny ping pong poster

Then we're at the party and I hear someone say, "There's a horse outside," and Kristin and I make a beeline for the door yelling "OHMYGOD THERE'S A DOG HAVING SEX WITH A TINY HORSE OUTSIDE!" or maybe more like, "Let's go see the pony" but I forget which.

Probably the latter since we're still employed.

Much to our dismay there was NO dog/pony shenanigans going on AND they wouldn't let me ride the pony even though half the 'kids' there were bigger than me.

DISAPPOINTING.

mini horse and dog in a hula skirt
Although there was no active cross-breeding going on outside, I did get to see a pug in a hula skirt so I still consider this a partial win but I AM calling shenanigans on the false-advertising in the poster.

Maybe next Halloween.

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33 comments:

Brutalism said...

Seriously...how are you not friends with the person that makes these posters?

Kage said...

hey! you should see what that miniature horse does to the dog when they get home at night.

nobody puts ladybug in an office corner.

ryoko861 said...

The charity table tennis poster got me. I lost it right there and haven't stopped laughing since. I literally have tears rolling down my face!! Pass the tissues please.

Ed said...

I had something really good, and then I got distracted by Kage's comment & pic.

nom nom nom nom

laughingmom said...

Would love to see the Blood Drive posters!

Mandy's Kidding said...

"Pug in a hula skirt" is my new phrase for "adorable." Do you think it will catch on?

Me: "OMG! Your baby looks like a pug in a hula skirt!"

Mother of Baby: *Glares*

Maybe not. I still like it.

Dazee Dreamer said...

Will you please run for President? I would so vote for you

Joshua said...

Thanks to Ed, I will always examine profile pics.

I second what ryoko said: pass the tissues.

Doug Stephens said...

Find out who designs those posters. Seriously. The world needs to know.

Knight said...

That's a great photo of you but what is with the hairy guy that has his hands all over you? Is that your "work buddy"?

ryoko861 said...

*passing box of Kleenex to Joshua* Here ya go!

Too fucking funny!

Christina_the_wench said...

Do they drug test at your work place?

Eva Gallant said...

They need to drug test the guy who does the posters! lol

Vinny C said...

I admire the mutual admiration you & your friend have animal cross-breed exhibitionism. Those are the kinds of bonds that can make friendships last forever.

Ann said...

Sorry you didn't get to witness a dog and pony show....is that what that expression means?

Just think, you could put up a fake poster and no one would know the difference.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

The phrase "pug in a hula skirt" I misread initially as "PIG in a hula skirt" and I was all nervous waiting for a picture of Lindsay Lohan on vacation in Hawaii or something. Phew!

Trooper Thorn said...

If a tiny pony is about the size of a pig, can you get bacon from it?

PBJdreamer said...

wow Kage is also distracting me



what was this post about?


Hi! (waving)




that is all

Opto-Mom said...

Now I've got that Cheap Trick song stuck in my head.

"Ride the pony, satisfy your funk
Ride the pony, satisfy your funk"

Also, those Asian are SERIOUS about some ping pong! DAY-UM!

Didactic Pirate said...

At our last office party for my job, we sat around, drank wine coolers, and discussed articles in the New Yorker.

There was a break when the stripper arrived with the donkey, and then right back into the discussion after she and the donkey were done.

You know academics. So damn stuffy.

Jewels said...

that poster made me straight laugh out loud. That kid looks terrified. I love it.

Sarah P said...

Table Tennis poster made my life.

A Vapid Blonde said...

I never get opportunities like this. My work parties are always with 3 other people who are all about 10 or more years older than me and every time I show up with a donkey they all just give me blank stares and cricket noises.

jack mehoff said...

they prefer to be referred to as "inter species errotica"

check my references:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wtZX1i6OYc

pattypunker said...

totally bucket list shit!

i'm with lady bug. i need tequila and roofies if i'm going to have anything to do with work parties.

The Empress said...

Moooog, seriously. WHY AREN"T YOU IN HOLLYWOOD???

Maxie said...

Oh my god -- do you remember that creepy video you sent me a year ago about a lady wanting to bang a horse.

Of course you don't because you're old.

Here. You're welcome. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oneKkknX7Q

Mike said...

If you stayed with match.com the dog coulda been doing YOU.

Malach the Merciless said...

So work where?

Sandra said...

Maybe they would have let you ride the pug? Did you ask? You never know until you ask. The worst they could say is "No" or "What are you? A sick fucker?"

Sheri (Mommy stuff blogger) said...

A horse outside, huh? You'd probably like this then, it's hilarious, and coincidentally, it's about a horse outside:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljPFZrRD3J8

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meleah rebeccah said...

Toooooooooo fucking funny Moog.

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