Sleepless in Seattle - Travelogue Day #2 | Mental Poo

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Sleepless in Seattle - Travelogue Day #2


So, I'm in Seattle this week on vacation with no access to a computer.

As such, I've decided to try to create a post of my activities for each day, and see
if I ended up getting it right.

This is Day #2:

*****************

Dear Travelogue,

I woke up this morning to the sound of my alarm going off at 4:45 a.m.

Apparently, people like to set the alarms on these f*cking clocks just before they check out, so that the next person coming in gets screwed on their first night's slip.

It's. BRILLIANT.

I'm SO doing this when I check out.


It didn't matter anyway, as my wife can't sleep in hotels.

She's so used to being in the rooms on an hourly rate, that she just never got used to it.

I KID!! I KID!!

(I'm not...it's how we paid for this trip)

Actually, my wife has an aversion to pillows that AREN'T her own. As such, between the uncomfortable pillows and the fact that I sound like I'm inhaling Tic-Tacs when I sleep, she doesn't get much rest.

But I slept GREAT and, since I'm driving, it's all that matters. She can catch some Z's in the Space Needle or something.


Tonight is the first Red Sox game, so we had all day to do something.

We decided to rent bikes.

Friend: "SO...how's was your vacation in Seattle?"

Me: "Oh. Great. I F*CKING EXERCISED."

WTF.

So, now I'M tired from riding a f*cking bicycle all over the goddamn place..but we still decided to visit the famous Pike Place Market.

Wife: "Why do we have to go to Pike Place Market?"

Me: "Because it's famous and they throw fish."

Wife: "What's there to do, though?"

Me: "I actually think it's just people throwing fish."

Wife: "Why do we want to see people throw fish?"

*blink*

Me: "Good question...but I'll be damned if I'm getting back on that f*cking bicycle."


So, we're off to see people throw fish around for some f*cking reason.

I hope one guy misses and it smashes my bicycle to shit.

That would be a good day.

GO SOX!!

See you tomorrow.

Moog out.

17 comments:

Smileygirl said...

Will you find me a house to live in while you're there? Check out Queen Anne hill and get back to me please...I'm there on Thursday. Chris Isaak concert, yet again!

Christina_the_wench said...

Those fish boys have made a killing promoting their smelly ways. They have a whole motivational work series called Fish Sticks. I shit you not.

I hope they wrecked your bike. Ride on.

C.Rag said...

Sorry for the alarm clock thing, I just hate having a morning wake up call.

Mike said...

Moooooog.

Drink more beer. Then she can use your gut for a pillow.

Problem solved.

AngryMan said...

The fun never stops at the Palace of Mooooog.

Un[Censored] said...

I would have to agree with you on that...riding a bike is lame...unless it's riding a bike to see people chuck fish at each other!!!

NICE!

Crys
http://thislesbianslyfe.blogspot.com

Narm said...

What the hell did you search when you found the picture of the guy throwing the girl?

GeologyJoe said...

two other things to do:
* get hammered in Pioneer Square. *Ride the monorail to the Space Needle.

Go SOX!

Whiskey Tits said...

whee! seattle! we'll have the iron lung ready for you when you come back contaminated!

Knight said...

"Sometimes she dresses like Carol Burnett for fun." I have no idea why I thought that was so funny but I laughed really loud. Does that mean I'm old? I have the humor sense of an old gay man, don't I?

Go for the fish throwing, stay for the shops full of crap you will never need.

Evil Genius said...

So, did you catch any of those fish that were being thrown about? And if so, did you have to lug it back to the hotel on the bicycle? Phew! Sounds like too much work to me.

Go SOX!

Geoff said...

Pike's Place was pretty awesome when we were up there. They had some AWESOME food, great prices and tons of produce.

That being said, Seattle kinda blows. Hit the art museum and try to bike over a homeless dude's legs. it's a sport up there.

LBluca77 said...

At least the Sox won after loosing to the Angels all damn weekend long.

catscratch said...

Nothing better than peddlin ass on vacation I always say.

Malach the Merciless said...

Sox win!

Prin said...

Why can't the wife just sleep on you? You're a pillow and she definitely owns you...

meleah rebeccah said...

I have the same issue as your wife. I even bring my OWN pillows from home because I cant deal with hotel pillows or sheets.

I laughed OUT LOUD because of the Carol Burnett reference....and because you exercised on vacation.

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