Before I start today it has come to my attention that last Monday, September 14th, was my two year anniversary on starting this stupid blog.
Please...sit down...you're embarrassing yourselves.
I accept gifts in the form of cash, Paypal, adult novelties, porn, porn strapped to an adult novelty with cash, and nude photos of females in various poses with any of the previously mentioned items.
Thanks in advance.
On a side note:
Dad..I swear...you send me nude photos again and I'll hunt you down and kill you myself.
ONWARD!!
*******************
Motivate THIS.
(points at crotch)
Nothing to see here today...
...except a custom "motivational poster" made by yours truly over at Big Huge Labs.
Seriously...
...I have no idea how I made it almost 40 years without finding this thing.
Here's today's poster for you (click to enlarge (that's what she said)):
Been there, dude.
One question, guys:
Does this cast make me look fat?
If you want to see all of my custom posters, click here.
If you like them, feel free to post them on your site.
Just give me some credit.
God knows my bank won't.
Moog out.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Motivational Filler - Consequences
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19 comments:
You outdid yourself with the poster today.
I just want you to know that I'm holding you personally responsible for my continuing lack of employment. I mean, WTF... how am I supposed to go out and beat the pavement when I have so many motivational posters to make? You've created a monster!
Sending pics of my wife. May they haunt your dreams as they do mine.
Feel my pain.
As for your poster......guess the funny part takes 6-8 weeks.
love the poster AND your comment is the funniest yet by far on my blog. i may have to feature you or something. how your comedic genius has gone unrecognized thus far is ... unimaginable
clearly, this sort of thing is child's play to you and you've got a million of 'em.
at this point, you're going to take all three top spots in the funniest comment contest, AND be a featured blogger on my blog and THEN all my followers will stop coming to my blog, b/c CLEARLY you are the superior comic CLEARLY.
your wife must feel so lucky to be entertained on a daily basis. either that or you annoy the shit out of her. it's a toss up, isn't it?
Nude photos? Hmmm...not after that embarassing Facebook incident...
In response to your Dolphins jab -
Who won the division last year? If we want to live in the past we can talk about undefeated seasons together - but I'm not just talking about undefeated REGULAR seasons.
Burn - like when I pee. I need to quit that double-fist masturbation.
I know what to get you for Christmas now. Vaseline Intensive Care or Jergen's?
Happy dropping of the Deuce!
I don't normally comment on the Motivational posters, but I am today.
Because, honestly, I'm bored.
You're welcome.
Here goes:
Peach: Thanks. Want to pass that shit on to Ed over here? He's being a prick.
CatLady: yeah...with a name like 'Cat Lady', it's MY fault you're unemployed.
Just sayin'.
Ed: I'm not sure if you're being a prick, or just being an ass. Please clarify.
Also, I did not get pics of your wife (other than the ones already posted on butchlesbos.com).
Thanks in advance.
Speaking: "COMEDIC GENIUS." See that, Ed? See that shit?
That's what I'm talking about right there.
(Speaking: how much do I owe you for that?)
Olly: Oh..I remember that. The inclusion of the donkey was a nice touch.
Narm: That wasn't a jab. I was trying to get you to feel MY pain in losing a game.
You should be used to that shit by now.
I'll give you this, though: Looks like we'll know what you fins fans feel like this year.
We gonna suuuuuuck.
Christina: HA! Good one.
(Jergen's)
Justjp: How did you know I just finished...oh...blog birthday thing.
* cough
Thanks.
Do I really have to chose between a prick and an ass? This is just like when I was in prison.
As for the pics: I tried e-mailing them to you at midgitasswrangler@blogger.com, like you said, but it came back saying mooog doesn't receive messages there.
So I took the liberty of posting them at My_Wife_is_a_Sucubus.com.
Enjoy.
P.S. Thanks for feeling the need to address me in your comments to everyone else. Geez little man, its just jokes. Take it easy.
Ed: Prison?
I thought I recognized you from somewhere.
And, yes...I know it's just jokes.
Hence my comments.
By the way, you spelled 'midget' wrong in the email address. That's why it's being denied.
I mean..um...wrong email!
Don't worry about it. You probably didn't recognize me from the front and with my clothes on. Happens all the time.
Ahem.
Whatever.
Happy 2 years! I can't believe someone can come up with as many funny shit stories as you have for 2 years straight. I am amazed. And since I am immature I like poo stories and will continue to come back as long as you keep posting.
Cheers!
I am poor, so here is some porn
Two years! Dude, you're a frigging veteran. Thank you for your service.
Such a great you came to an anniversary like this and well through.
Your such a great, happy anniversay.
I gave you a happy blogoversary shout out at the Cat Lady's house for WTF Wednesday this week.
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