Have You Peed on a Happy Face Today? | Mental Poo

Monday, December 06, 2010

Have You Peed on a Happy Face Today?

This is what greeted me in the bottom of a men's room urinal at work the other day:



Awesome.

A smiley face.

I get stage fright as it is so, you know, no added pressure here with someone GRINNING AT ME.

So now I'm standing there kind of like aiming for it's mouth (like you WOULDN'T) and it's smile is just getting BIGGER AND BIGGER like having it showered in my pee is actually making it HAPPIER so now I'm thinking what kind of person would actually LIKE this?



Oh.

That kind.

Then I thought this image would make a great greeting card:



..and I told myself I wasn't gonna cry.

So after I peed on the happy pink urinal cake I of course stood back and took a picture of it FOR YOUR ENTERTAINMENT and THEN realized after the shutter sound went off that there was a guy taking a poop in the stall next to me and he just heard my camera go off because he did the AHEM cough to announce himself right after and even though I couldn't read his lips no matter how hard I tried to peer through the tiny slit in the stall door I'm pretty sure I heard him whisper, "..the fuck..?"

Typical Tuesday, really.

Except now I'm in a really really good mood.

Thank you, Mr. Urinal Cake.

**********************

UPDATE:

I just realized that this is the second time I've taken a picture of the inside of a urinal at work.

It's only a matter of time before I'm reported to HR.

32 comments:

Midwestern Mama Holly said...

I don't know how men use urinals with or without a smiley face at the bottom.. I can not pee in front of strangers. And lets face it.. after you've seen your co-worker's junk how can you go back to UNseeing that?

Vinny C said...

Finally, R Kelly just found his dream date.

Ed said...

I say, if you can't take pictures in the mens room, than that's not a company you want to work for anyway.

It's freedom of expression really.

You should be able to have your cake, and piss on it too. And then take a picture of it.

Dazee Dreamer said...

And people think I'm strange for taking my camera everywhere I go. You rock.

Elly Lou said...

Photoshop on a little santa hat and your xmas card is done. Oh wait. That would probably work better with a yule log, eh?

Kimber Leszczuk. said...

That is great! I wonder if they make them in different colors....

LMAO at the thought of the guy in the stall wondering why you were taking photos.

Lady J said...

HILARIOUS!!! I love this and having two boys at home I know the reason for it. Things like that make me jealous I can't play! LOL!!!

I can only imagine what the guy in the stall thought as he heard the camera...."freak"! (his thoughts) :)

Brutalism said...

What kind of person would actually like getting peed on? I thought of five people off the top of my head...

I need new friends.

Jeremy from We Took The Bait said...

If I were a member of a urinal cake think tank... which, sadly, I'm not.... I would want to design the same smiley cake made out of that hyper-color material from the 80's shirts... you know, the ones where you could get handprints all over them from the temperature change? I'd make the cake go from happy face to sad face every time it's piddled on.

Either that, or I'd just mass manufacture urinal cakes with the Pittsburgh Penguins logo on them.

Moooooog35 said...

Midwestern: We don't pee in front of strangers. That's why we all shake hands and then discuss shit like football before we even THINK about taking out our penis and swordfighting with them.

Jeez. What kind of animals do you think we are?

Vinny: I think it's too old.

Ed: My point EXACTLY.

Dazee: The only thing is I get weird looks when I have to set up the tripod.

Elly: Um. Ew?

Kimber: Yes. Yes they do. Check my link at the bottom of the page.

Lady: You can play, just don't be shocked when we hit on you in the men's room.

Brutalism: Was one of the five you?

Jeremy: Like mood rings but with urine.

Genius.

alexa - cleveland's a plum said...

there were lebron themed urinal cakes in cleveland last week!

The Empress said...

oh, god, moooooog, you are so nuts.

"I'm so happy for you I want your piss on my face."

You're killing me here.

Today, I peed and farted.

Thank you so very much.

You suck.

A Vapid Blonde said...

That little guy looks like a tiny stripper cake what with all that glitter and pink.

ThePeachy1 said...

I got divorced when my son was just 6 months old so he ALWAYS went to the ladies room and had no clue what a freak urinal was until I got remarried when he was 6 years old. My new husband took him into the bathroom and as he was explaining the urinal to my son my son reached in and grabbed the urinal cake and said "opps somebody dropped this" ACK ERK UGG. yeah he's 19 now and we still rub it in that he picked up a urinal cake, I can only think the smiley faces will cause similar situations for others.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

On behalf of all cake anywhere I'd like to register my disgust at the word "cake" being used in such a manner. Cake should never be something you pee on, unless by "pee" you mean "drizzle in cream" otherwise I object strenuously. It should be called a "urinal patty".

There, I have spoken.

Eva Gallant said...

You really need to get out more. Taking photos of urinal cakes in the john at work.....not a good sign!

Chickensconsigliere@gmail.com said...

now I know what my 15-year-old is getting for Christmas. And that is not a statement regarding your maturity, I swear.

Narm said...

You missed out on a chance to give that thing the best pubic mustache in history.

Well...

Second best - but you made me promise not to blog about that night.

Jen said...

I was just thinking to myself that I was sure you had written about urinal cakes before. I'm surprised it was only once before.

Malach the Merciless said...

You would do R. Kelly proud

vickilikesfrogs said...

Sweet Baby Jesus. If they had those in the ladies', I swear, I would so stand up to pee EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

And I also think it would look enormously cute with a little Santa hat! You should get to work on that right away.

boldlymocking said...

And here I thought you'd only find pink urinal cakes in SF {wink}.

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

Ha! Look at it this way, that guy in the stall had a GREAT story to tell the rest of the day! This post was hilarious, thanks for (ahem) sharing! :)

Christa said...

OMG - this made my morning! Very funny, thanks!

Boom Boom Larew said...

But how do you know the urinal cake is a he and not a she? Oh yeah... no hair.

You've Got to Be Kidding Me said...

I'd like to see an Angry Face urinal cake. What can I say, I like realism.

ClevelandPoet said...

it wants you to aim for its mouth...nay it NEEDS you to aim at its mouth.

bravo for being so kind.

when the dude did the ahem cough. you should have said

"can you move your leg a little I cant get a good picture."

Captain Dumbass said...

If you do get hauled into HR, make sure you record the conversation. That would be blog gold.

Christina In Wonderland said...

Ha! You should probably market a line of Happy Urinal Merchandise! There are weird people in this world... and I know a few who would buy stuff just to say they did.

The Demigoddess said...

Hey, you guys can use a little encouragement in the urinal. We get it.

BlahCooCooBlah said...

I <3 your blog. After reading this post, I'm seriously going to eat some cake. Minus urine.

meleah rebeccah said...

I dont know what's funnier. You getting *caught* taking the photo OR you making a DATING PROFILE for a urinal cake. Holy. Hilarious.

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