Tell Me You Want My Dongle | Mental Poo

Friday, January 28, 2011

Tell Me You Want My Dongle

NOTE:

The following post contains graphic language and some suggested nudity but basically just written in tech-talk so it will probably all go right over your head unless you really know computer shit and/or are from Bangalore at which point you'll have to go flog yourself or something (I have NO clue what those Baptists do) after you read it.

Enjoy.

And another Instant Message flurry with my friend, Kristin, commences...


So then I got really horny and had to rub one out in the men's room (third time's the charm!) and started writing this post because I know I have to work but this blog isn't going to write itself, boss...

..when I notice this:


???

Hot. Right?

But I have NO clue what it is but Kristin is one of those teabagging (not the good kind), sandwich-board wearing (not the good kind, either) political freakazoids so I HAVE to ask.


To be perfectly honest I DON'T have a thing for Ruth Bader Ginsburg and actually had to Google how to spell it and a bunch of pictures came up of her including some of her younger years:


Not bad.

Back in the day, I would have totally put my floppy in her access point.

Excuse me now...

I have to go flog myself.

Moog out.

26 comments:

Christina_the_wench said...

I understood it all. I'm so ashamed.

Vodka Logic said...

How is it you can make anything into a sexual innuendo... I mean anything.

I also feel bad for whomever cleans your bathroom..

I do like Kristin

Eva Gallant said...

Curse the day that I became just techno savvy enough to follow that conversation! Now I'll have to wash my eyes out with soap!

Mrsblogalot said...

I'm going back home to change my earrings.


Then I'm coming to your job to fill out an application.

Kev D. said...

I want your Dongle?

Nikki Rules said...

Dam. Notice how outta nowhere she mentions how its crazy hot? HOT! Something tells me Kristin wants YOUR usb stick... Do I really have to spell it all out for you?

Rhetoric Camel said...

Wait a second, there are other ways to make sexual references other than techy geeky ways?

Sarah P said...

You are not allowed to bang Ruth Bader Ginsburg.

However, a chinese finger cuff with you, Glenn Beck and Nancy Pelosi would be hott.

Brutalism said...

I have lots of fun with our IT department here, talking about dongles and docking stations and whether or not I'm ready for a 12-incher (SCREEN, you potty brains)!

Dazee Dreamer said...

I love it when you talk dirty like that. I wish I could IM you all day and talk that way. :)

Kage said...

could you please rewrite this post, referencing women of canadian politics, for your friends north of the border?

may i suggest belinda stronach, and stephen harper.

Mrs. Bitch said...

Can I be the one to tell Kristin that her Avatar is actually Nanookie of the North (aka Palin)? Pleeeeeaaaassseeeee? The Teabaggers are going to kick her out of the club for that one.

ThePittsofBeingPeachy said...

oddly enough this is actual interface talk in my house. My husband is native american. He's Park of the MoGeekhan Tribe and his indian name is He who sits at desk. Unless our power supply over heats or there's some catastrophic hard drive failure this will be used tonight. Thanks.

pattypunker said...

kristin definitely wants to take a spin on his read/write head.

Ann said...

I want your dongle...

O.K. now why did you want us to tell you that?

I feel dirty.

If I Were God... said...

So THIS is the reason I.T. is so slow fixing problems?! You're too busy texterbating all goddamn day!

Trooper Thorn said...

You must get a rager when you see Bella Abzug or Helen Thomas.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

My friend gave me some hoop earrings for Christmas. Guess she's hinting at me to go and bang the postman or something.

Here's something that will cool your cockles. Ann Coulter. That is all.

Chris@Knucklehead! said...

You get bonus points for not using the "gimme" terms like "RAM", "Hard Drive" and "3 1/2 inch floppy."

Moooooog35 said...

My apologies to everyone today but I've had to actually do work today WTF and it's totally screwed up my blogging mojo so let's just say 'HAHAHA..Yes. I agree with what you have said!' as a blanket comment.

I'll make it up to you all.

*rubs nipples

A Vapid Blonde said...

Dongle sounds too much like a dingleberry and they serve no purpose other than to make you run around in circles trying to fling it off.

Not that I would know.

The Lissst! said...

Now you've got me all worked up. in a Techxual kind of way.

Malach the Merciless said...

Pelosi is a Cougar

StephanieC | Seriously? Really?? Seriously? said...

I need video proof of this nipple rubbing you speak of.

Also?

WHAT.THE.FUCK, I didn't know that about hoop earrings! And I never even got laid! Jesus!

Complete rejection.

J.J. in L.A. said...

Haha! I'm a geek (understood it all).

Ed said...

Careful dude.

I heard Kristin had a virus.

Related Posts with Thumbnails