Juanita? You damn near killed her! | Mental Poo

Monday, March 12, 2012

Juanita? You damn near killed her!

That title makes no sense.

Then, again, neither does owning a dead, stuffed weasel and putting an apron on it.

Ah, Bloggess. You are one messed up broad of epic proportions. Never change.

A while ago, The Bloggess wrote a post about her newly acquired victim of taxidermy, a weasel that she affectionately named "Juanita" for reasons unknown to us and probably 16 of the 20 personalities in her head.

Of course she put an apron on it and then captioned it:


Ugh. I know. Making a souffle is so touch-and-go, Juanita.

So touch-and-go.

Sometimes you shouldn't even try to compete with shit like this BUT The Bloggess decided to give us all a blank template to work with and thus began my 72-hour obsession of making my very own Jaunita pictures.

Enjoy.

















Those were my entries. There was no contest.

I get bored at work.

Hopefully, Bloggess keeps buying weird stuffed shit because, honestly, the days are long when you're not pasting stuffed weasels into roller coaster photos.

The more you know.

26 comments:

Unknown said...

I LOVE THE BLOGGESS!!! I tell people that I am pretty sure she is my long lost sister!

Juanita is awesome! I haven't spent a lot of time creating my little pictures of horror, but there are some developing in my head. I actually think she needs a new outfit.

Unknown said...

72 hours well spent.

The roller coaster could not have been more perfect. They're all hilarious!

Ed said...

All worthy entries for a no-contest.


And Bloggess only has 20 personalities???

Seems you might be low-balling just a bit, suckup.

Anonymous said...

Oh good lord. There goes my productivity for the morning--again-- as I will be obsessing over Juanita in all her incarnations--again--this time thanks to you. Awesome.
That is all.

Anonymous said...

These were magnificent! If not already, now my coworkers definitely think something is wrong with me for my random outburts of laughter.

jack mehoff said...

so im stuffing the weasel last night....

Bored Housewife said...

Thank you for this, made my day.

Anonymous said...

Your The Scream entry made it onto her pintrest board.

Chris said...

Absolutely, positively worth the strange looks I got from people that sit near me. "Juas" is my personal favorite.

Miss Yvonne said...

Well done, sir. I especially enjoyed the crowd photo...it was like a "Where's Juanita" book.

Dazee Dreamer said...

Ok, that just made my whole week.

handflapper said...

I've been following the Juanita craze since its inception, and I must say, these are some of the best incarnations I've seen. There ought to be a contest. You would win. But knowing The Bloggess, you probably wouldn't want the prize.

Anonymous said...

They were all great, but I am a Star Wars fan. Based on that, you can guess which one I chose.

ClevelandPoet said...

everything is a contest. A contest already won by the Bloggess but a contest nevertheless.

Brett Minor said...

I have seen Juanita around. I need to make some of those. I could always use a new wallpaper.

Lou said...

I think you missed an obvious one. Doesn't Juanita remind you of Willem Defoe on the 'Platoon' movie posters? If I had any photoshop skills (or photoshop for that matter) I would do it myself.

MommaKiss said...

No picture of your weasel with The Weasel?

I'm disappointed.

Kara said...

Juas is my personal favourite - it's the perfect play on words, except of course the 'J' is silent, which just makes it even funnier.

* The MOM said...

CHHHHHHRIST!!! LOL!!!! Those are fantastic!! Love me some Bloggess.....and Moooog.

meleah rebeccah said...

The Juggling one = HILARIOUS.

chicktuition said...

I'm really glad you have entirely too much time on your hands. These are all hilarious! :)

Dawn Duddy said...

You did a fabulous job! LOL Oh my gosh. And yes, the Bloggess has monopolized my time as well.... over and over and over!

~Nikki said...

Pure. Artistic. GENIUS.

mypixieblog said...

I don't know what made me laugh harder. the "can someone hand me an adjustable wrench" caption or "juas." either way, this was hysterical, thank you.

Daniel Mizrachi said...

Omg they are all so funny. My favourite has to be I am your father. :D

jillsmo said...

There's nothing about this post that ISN'T brilliant.

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