Things I've come across on Amazon. Not literally.

With my book now published and available on Amazon.com (plug), I spend roughly every other second of the day seeing if it's rank has gone up.

If it hasn't, or has gone down, I spend the seconds in between the checking sobbing.

It's a vicious cycle.

Regardless, as I'm checking the stats I've come across a number of things that I find odd, hilarious or OMG that need to be shared.

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That's right.

I'm getting BETTER REVIEWS THAN THE BIBLE.

There will be no living with Jesus after this.

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MY EYES!!!

That? That is why you don't name your book after yourself.

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These two I'm on the fence about.

FIRST: I'm in great company with The Bloggess and Suzy Soro (BOTH of whom, I might add, are quoted on my back cover). Throw Stephen Colbert in there and we have quite the trifecta.

But then you throw in the monkey jammies, milk and banana cutter and, well, confusion sets in.

That said:

For your homework, right after you buy several dozen copies of my book, is to go to The Tuscan Milk page and read the reviews.

I spent several hours doing this. You will die laughing.

Which is much better than looking inside Al Roker.

Trust me on this.

A Nanny Goat and a Surfer Wife read a Brutalism book: The "Things Go Wrong for Me" Book Blogging Tour - Day 2

Before I start today, just want to give you an actual quote taken from the back cover of my book:

Of course that is Jenny Lawson, aka, "The Bloggess."

Yes. The Bloggess thought my book was 'wonderfully hilarious.'

Also?

I received an email from her on Friday that she bought the hard copy of the book.

*passes out

That, people? That's some serious validation right there.

So, happy.

Well, my book, "Things Go Wrong for Me" went on sale last Friday, December 14th.

As of right now, it has surpassed BOTH "The DaVinci Code" and "The King James Bible" in Amazon.com sales.

One of those two previous sentences is total bullshit.

To help celebrate the release of my book, several bloggers agreed to read, review and interview me to help get the ball rolling during my first full week of book sales. None of these people were compensated for this in any way, shape or form. They're just helping me out out of the kindness of their hearts.

They are probably pissed about this.

Book Blogging Tour - Day 2

Today's participants in the Blogging Tour are:

Margaret Andrews of "Nanny Goats in Panties" - I was VERY excited to have Margaret on board for this, and she seemed very excited to do it. Great, great lady.

Monique - aka, "A Day in the Life of SurferWife" - Monique is frigging AMAZING and SOLELY responsible for getting THE super hot and very funny Jenny McCarthy to put a quote on my book about how hilarious it is. I honestly have no words to thank her enough.

Brutalism - I LOVE this chick.

Go check out to see what they have to say about my book, "Things Go Wrong for Me!"

Don't forget to check out Day 1 of the Book Blogging Tour, as well!! Some GREAT interviews and reviews!!

"Things Go Wrong for Me" Ordering Info:

"Things Go Wrong for Me" is available at:

Amazon: http://bit.ly/12o6h8N

Amazon (Kindle Version): http://bit.ly/ZpoiVk

Barnes and Noble: http://bit.ly/UIgJBw

RCG Publishing: http://www.rcgpublishing.com

Going to RCG Publishing will give you links to all the books PLUS the option to get an AUTOGRAPHED copy!!

Yes, Virginia, I DO have a book. "Things Go Wrong for Me" IS NOW ON SALE!!

And just like that,

I'M A PUBLISHED AUTHOR.

File this under 'OMG OMG OMG OMG'

My first-ever book, "Things Go Wrong for Me" is now available!!!

HOLY. CRAPBALLS.

The book is available in paper and e-book formats at Amazon.com and Amazon Kindle, Barnes and Noble and RCGPublishing.com.

To order YOUR copy from Amazon.com, just click this great big button:

If you'd like a SIGNED copy of the book, you can do so at RCGPublishing.com or by clicking here.

I have SO many people to thank - including YOU, my faithful readers - that I don't even know where to begin so I will leave my thanks to the 'dedication' section of my book.

That said, here are a couple of reviews that I've ALREADY received and that you'll find on the book itself!

You might recognize some of the names:

"Rodney Lacroix has created a wonderfully hilarious book, and also has a very fun name to say out loud."
Jenny Lawson
Author of NYT Bestseller, Let's Pretend This Never Happened

"A hysterical book written by a man with no filter, a vasectomy and a name like 'Rod?' I'm all over it."
Jenny McCarthy
NYT Bestselling Author, TV personality, Cougar Raper

Um, yeah.

That's THE Jenny McCarthy and THE Bloggess.

Again, I say "HOLY SHITBALLS."

I also got great reviews from comedienne/actress Suzy Soro and Bo Sellers, Boston radio personality, Kevin Barbare, actor David Beach and another super famous blogger Margaret Andrews of "Nanny Goats in Panties" fame.

I hope you enjoy the book as much as they did.

"Things Go Wrong for Me" is available at:

Amazon: http://bit.ly/12o6h8N

Amazon (Kindle Version): http://bit.ly/ZpoiVk

Barnes and Noble: http://bit.ly/UIgJBw

RCG Publishing: http://www.rcgpublishing.com

Going to RCG Publishing will give you links to all the books PLUS the option to get an AUTOGRAPHED copy!!

BONUS: The Kindle version of the book will be available at a reduced price of $2.99 for the first week!!

Thanks, guys. I couldn't have gotten this far without you.

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HELP WANTED!

I'm looking for anyone who wants to help me get the word out about the book prior to the release, during and after with Blog posts (interviews, reviews, etc.), Tweets and Facebook status updates.

If you're interested, please email me at midgetmanofsteel@yahoo.com and we can work out the details.

Thank you!!

Juanita? You damn near killed her!

That title makes no sense.

Then, again, neither does owning a dead, stuffed weasel and putting an apron on it.

Ah, Bloggess. You are one messed up broad of epic proportions. Never change.

A while ago, The Bloggess wrote a post about her newly acquired victim of taxidermy, a weasel that she affectionately named "Juanita" for reasons unknown to us and probably 16 of the 20 personalities in her head.

Of course she put an apron on it and then captioned it:


Ugh. I know. Making a souffle is so touch-and-go, Juanita.

So touch-and-go.

Sometimes you shouldn't even try to compete with shit like this BUT The Bloggess decided to give us all a blank template to work with and thus began my 72-hour obsession of making my very own Jaunita pictures.

Enjoy.

















Those were my entries. There was no contest.

I get bored at work.

Hopefully, Bloggess keeps buying weird stuffed shit because, honestly, the days are long when you're not pasting stuffed weasels into roller coaster photos.

The more you know.