My next Tweet - Kardashians and Taylor Swift and dog poop, OH MY! | Mental Poo

Friday, January 04, 2013

My next Tweet - Kardashians and Taylor Swift and dog poop, OH MY!

I haven't done this for a while and was in my second day back at work after almost 3 weeks of vacation so I figured I was due to eff off for a bit.

If you follow me on Twitter, you know that my Tweets are kind of a mess, but this link right here will take your Tweets, mix them up, and come up with suggestions for your next one.

Results may vary.

Here are some of the ones they came up with for me. Admittedly, most of them sound like they're being delivered by Yoda, but whatever.

Enjoy:

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Months from now we will learn that, yes, there is a back man trapped in Kim Kardashian's ultrasound.

You heard it here first.

My deli cheese can be such an asshole.

At least my blanket has manners.

Wife burning. Baby Jesus. Snow blowing.

What's the question here?

OH MY GOD, GABRIELLE, WILL YOU PLEASE STOP PISSING OFF YOUR BLONDE?!

I think we already know that Taylor Swift only loves for dramatic effect.

See? You can't put ANYTHING past those assholes driving Land Rovers.

This one doesn't make sense to me.

Why would I move when I have my preferred porn on my lawn RIGHT HERE?!

Head shaker, that one.

All I know is that, yes, if it's crossable, there's going to be much discomfort.

Ah. Words to live by:

Never forget balls.

Never forget balls.
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You can also find me on Facebook as well.

8 comments:

carissajade said...

This makes you sound like you came from a time in history where everyone drinks tea. And now I can't write like a normal human after reading those.

Unknown said...

Your original tweets are way above this gadget's. And they are going to make you famous. And someday I will say, "I knew him back when he was just a crazy blogger and emcee for that bunch of girls whose name I forget."

Anonymous said...

Huh?????

Anonymous said...

Computers are getting smarter and smarter.

Congratulations on the book.

Deb said...

Here's mine:

Wonderful! Inspired to hug my Navy SEAL best school in the keg of morons.

deb

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled upon your blog today, and this tweet generator-thing kills me, so I had to go use it myself. :)

You are really funny!

Add another follower to your list. ;)

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha! I never saw this thing before now! Here's my favorite from my own Tweets:

Mmmmmmn...plaid Snuggie Knot-a-Blanket. I glimpsed your pants, leaving them on my 9-yr-old butch!

Unknown said...

Oh my God. I can't breathe...

Mine said, "You really put out next week. Thanks for a feeling most were composed between 1 and laugh!"

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