Family Circus and the Day I Got My Ass Sued | Mental Poo

Monday, January 18, 2010

Family Circus and the Day I Got My Ass Sued

Bite me, Billy.

As I was perusing through the Sunday Funnies as I normally do, it dawned on me that "Family Circus" is one of the absolute worst comic strips of all time.

Why I'm the last to realize this, I have no fucking clue.

Regardless, I decided to take some of the Family Circus cartoons and update them with my brand of 2010 humor.


(click to enlarge...that's what she said)





















That's better.

I suppose the next time you'll hear from me, it will be from jail due to Copyright infringement or some shit.

Fuck it. Totally worth it.

Take that, Billy!

Moog out.


Maxie said...

i can't wait till i'm to the age where i dont give a shit about getting stds. life will be so much better then.

i dont know what that to do with this entry, but it's the first thing that popped into my head.


MommaKiss said...

I'll consider bailing you out if you get arrested. but then again, you may really enjoy prison.

meleah rebeccah said...

these are friggen hilarious. My favorite 'updated' version of yours is the one that says,

"I heard daddy use all these words in a sentence last night...."


Ed said...

They may suck, but at least he gets paid for his comics.

Colby said...

My brother and I actually searched the public library for books of the Family Circus comic strips when we were kids. I'm too am just now discovering how bad they were. Yours are sooooo much better.

Unknown said...


Donnie said...

I don't get it. Why? Because like you said The Family Circus sucks and I never give it a glance.

Lee said...

I think you should donate your brain to science.

Dual Mom said...

I'm with Lee.

JenJen said...

I told you about my phone work in confidence!!
So betrayed.....

Brutalism said...

First time I have ever laughed at the Family Circus...well, except for the one where Grandpa died...

Tgoette said...

Loved the updated Family Circus cartoons. I agree, they are awful in the original format. Maybe someday they will get with the times and dad will be passed out drunk on the couch, mom will be getting high with her girlfriend and the kids will have tattoos and piercings and be skinny from all the heroin use. I can get into that kind of Family Circus.

Elly Lou said...

So did you just pick the first 6 you could find or did you actually have to pour through pages and pages of that drivel before you found fun ones to mock? If the latter, I think we should note your great sacrifice. Also, I suspect you printed out a few for your fridge...didn't you?!?

MrsBlogAlot said...

My God.... Yours are sooooo much better (I just set myself up right?)
Chinese soldier...killed me!!!!!!!

Sarah said...

Worst. Comic strip. Ever.

This site screws with the strip, too:

ClaireMontgomeryMD said...

absolutely worth the jail time!

Moooooog35 said...

Maxie: Um...what point in your life is THAT?!

Momma: does the body good. Except for, you know, your sphincter.

Meleah: Why I'm doing tech shit still is beyond me.

Ed: So says the guy also not getting paid to comment.

Colby: You LOOKED for those comics?

That's 7 shades of wrong.



Don: Or do you not give it a glance because you forgot your reading glasses, grandpa?

Lee: It's Abby..something. Abby Normal!

Dual: Maybe you two should get lunch. I mean, since you're together and all.

JenJen: Some things must just be shared with all mankind.

Brutalism: I should have done the whole * footnote thing. Thanks for reminding me of the Grandpa one..funniest. comic. ever.

Tgoette: I'm not sure why my upbringing would make a good cartoon, but to each his own.

Elly: I poured through pages and pages (upwards of two). Begin chanting NOW.

Mrsblogalot: Chinese soldier is my favorite, too. Racism is funny.

Sarah: I think Peanuts and Marmaduke can give it a run for it's money.

Claire: I'll let the judge know you said that.

Unknown said...

I hope that "prison orange" is one of your colors!

Lothiriel said...

LOL! these are good!

Travis said...

Hell, I like them.

I liked the originals too, so I guess I like it all.

It would be a crying shame if you never had anymore free time.

Mike said...

Let us know how that lawsuit works out for you.

Maybe you can use the Mental Poo mug sales to pay your legal bills?

Me-Me King said...

It's a good thing you know Karate, it'll come in handy while you're in prison.

Coffeypot said...

You should rename yours “The Family Circle Jerk” said...

Billy's such a prick. I'd like to donkey punch him.

Vodka Logic said...

I'll add a paypal donation button on my blog, in 15 years we might have money for bail or a bad lawyer..

Kirsten said...

Love it!! Keep it up! I'm willing to sacrifice your financial future for a good laugh!

Olly said...

LOVE IT! The only more pathetic cartoon is Fred Bassett. Good God, that couple should have their dog put down and get a life! Let's see you redo a few of those!

Moooooog35 said...

Eva: Always has been. Always will be.

LMJ: Thanks! Tell your friends!

Wow. I'm really, really sad.

Tell your friends anyway!

Travis: Free time? Dude. I'm working.


Mike: I've sold three. Not sure I can afford much more than Marcia Clark.

Me-Me: You're right. I should ask the sensei to practice our 'anti prison rape' techniques.

Coffey: Isn't that on your mailbox?

hiphop: Can you do that to a guy? You know, I don't want to know.

Vodka: Anything you can do to help. Thank you.

Kirsten: Me too! Wait. What?

Olly: Proud to say: never read Fred Bassett. Never want to now. It's up to you.

Malach the Merciless said...

Bill Keane is the Anti-Christ

The Absent Minded Housewife said...

Is nothing sacred? June Cleaver is gonna beat you bruised with her pearls for such blasphemy.

LBluca77 said...

I think I would have grown up to be a very different person if I had read your version of the comics as a kid.

Chris said...

I've always thought that Family Circus was painful, especially the whole "Not Me" subplot.

Your parody is outstanding, this needs to be a regular feature.

nonamedufus said...

Man, your artwork was spot on! Oh, and those updated captions were pretty good too.

Bridget Callahan said...


Moooooog35 said...

Malach: PHEW! I was really starting to get concerned that it was actually ME there for a while.

Becky: Mmmmm. June Cleaver.

Nope. Nothing is sacred!

Lbluca: Better, right? It's GOTTA be better.

Knucklehead: Hm..regular feature. We'll see if my lawyer says it's okay.

* invisible non existent lawyer says nothing


Noname: It's from all my practice drawing Scruffy.

Bridget: Nietzsche Family Circus? Wasn't that a Nazi? I really thought he'd reference more Hitler shit.

UberGrumpy said...

Ha! know knot knee knob. Priceless.

Could you give Barney the Purple Dinosaur the same treatment? I don't know if he still exists but he deserved a similar hot poker up the rectum

Chris said...

Olly has it ... Fred Basset might actually be ever more unfunny than Family Circus (hey, at least the little kids are cute - Fred doesn't even have that).

G'wan, just have a look - I'm sure you could improve it. A blind monkey with alzheimer's could probably improve it now that I think of it, so I'm sure you can handle the job.

alexa @clevelandsaplum said...

this is hilarious!

i hope you make this a recurring post.

now, what OTHER comics can you rewrite?

Tara said...

Hilarious, probably illegal, and totally un-PC. Awesome!

Jay Ferris said...

Thanks for confirming what I've suspected all along, that both you and Bil Keane are awful human beings. The good news is that you actually happen to be funny at it.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Good God, are you trying to tell me that while genuinely funny writers are unemployed, they continue to publish THIS crap???? GAHHH!!!!!!

Moooooog35 said...

Uber: Barney the Purple Dinosaur sounds dirty.

I think I could do something.

OH..with the actual dinosaur? Probably not.

Dufmanno: You people throw out these strips I have no idea about. I'm guessing I could have it worse.

Chris: I may just have to do that. SHIT. More work.

Alexa: Next up, PEANUTS!!

I hate peanuts.

The cartoon sucks, too.

Tara: You talking about me or the post?

Doesn't matter...all the same.

Jay: ..and I told myself I wasn't gonna cry...

Nanny: Are you calling my stuff crap? Or HIS stuff crap? Actually, it's all're good.

Tracie said...

Best. Post. Evah.

Unknown said...

How could you resist taking one of the thousands where the comic is just Billy leaving a dashed line trail behind him, updated to show that he's trying to find daddy's weed? Wait, did they already do that? I lose track.

Chicken Maker said...

Nice. That's all I can think to say at the moment.

sarah said...

Going to jail would give you all sorts of blogging topics.

adrienzgirl said...

Now that is Family Circus I like to read!

MJenks said...

That last one was awesome.

Well, they were all awesome.

The last one, though...*slow clap*

The Absence of Alternatives said...

Late to the fun. Better late than never, right? (That's also what she said...)


(click to enlarge...that's what she said)

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