That title will play itself out in a minute.
My wife, as an inner-city Kindergarten teacher, gives me a lot of story ideas.
This post is no exception.
My wife showed me a response she received from a newsletter that was sent home with the kids.
At the end of the newsletter, was a space for the parents to put in any comments.
People, let me say this:
If you think teachers are overpaid and have it easy...
...try deciphering shit like this every day (click to enlarge):
Sorry about the bluriness..but my camera phone is a piece of shit (the only one I've ever found with rotary dial).
Worst $4.99 I've ever spent.
Can you hear me now?
No. No I can't.
I don't think this phone came with a fucking speaker.
Fuck you, Verizon.
The comments the mom wrote were:
"I am look not bad Her write a paper draw idea to paper Her self write letter a paper Her know good count and number a paper."
I've read this, like, 12 times and don't have a single fucking clue what this is supposed to say.
Keep in mind this in NOT the Kindergarten student.
This is her MOTHER.
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
My wife gets a second - SECOND - response...
...almost as bad as the first:
* blink blink
"I am look her self write count paper her see count easy a paper."
I'm dying to know what these actually mean.
I figure I'd just send them each a letter asking:
"Dear Illiterate Mom,
I'm just hoping they don't reply.
I don't have that kind of time to try to figure that shit out.