Sometimes life hands you lemons.
I know I'm supposed to make lemonade but, SCREW YOU, LIFE..seriously? LEMONS?!
Life can be an ASSHOLE.
And then sometimes life hands you strange European guys who send you Yahoo Messenger Friend Requests out of the blue...
..and then you accept said European guy's friend request because even though you've seen the movie "Hostel" and are now scared of everything European you're pretty sure this is legit.
Well..
You get THIS:
I have not a clue who this guy is.
So I click on the link and it's this picture:
Ironically, this is a picture from another post I did forever ago about messed up Yahoo Messenger messages.
God makes me laugh sometimes.
We continue...
In yet ANOTHER strange twist...
This is NOT the first time I've been IM'd randomly out of the blue regarding midgets and sex.
You want my life, don't you?
Onward..
Here is the picture I found:
SEXY ASIAN BOY!
*cricket
So then European serial killer midget porn guy signs out and I'm just sitting here staring at this entire conversation thinking "THANK YOU, GOD - THIS MADE MY WHOLE DAY" when I look over at the guy's Yahoo avatar:
Yep.
Total European midget porn watching serial killer tutor.
SO GLAD HE'S ON MY BUDDY LIST!!
Stay tuned.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Midget Porn, Yahoo and the Crazy European Serial Killer Tutor
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23 comments:
You are seriously rocking the net these days dude!!! You know the google search I sent you with your name and now this?? Hmmm.. wonder if it's the same person??
SO HOTT!
If he wants to be in gay midget porn, he's gonna need about a gallon of hot wax on that bush coming out of his banana hammock.
Never mind, he wouldn't know what a gallon was. Communists!
"Just send a smurf in to check it out" ..... is cracking me up.
And so does "Jackie Chan in a banana hammock".
But mostly, I think it's HYSTERICAL ] you are now buddies with said, European midget porn watching serial killer tutor.
Damn that's messed up and hilarious!
Is it possible bente is really your long lost, midget porn loving, mutant penis cat owning, half brother and he's, you know, trying to test the waters as to whether or not you'd be open to a little family reunion/"Hostel" reenactment?
If he doesn't kill you imagine what the Christmas cards wil look like!
Awesome.
Now, stop badmouthing IHOP.
(Just sitting here shaking my head in disbelief!)
You're dedication to training this guy to be even MORE creepy is the sign of a true mentor and scholar - I commend you good sir.
well done. i'm new to your blog, but i'm looking forward to reading more.
I'm with SisterMerryHellish.
To paraphrase Will Ferrell as James Lipton, eating an IHoP steak omelette is like staring into the face of God, and having him smile back and say "This is my most wonderful creation."
I hate it when Jackie Chan looks better in my underwear than I do. *sigh*
ahahah oh man this was hilarious! I do not even know where to begin!
ugh. i dunno what's creepier, the cat or the killer.
I realized a long time ago (like, circa 2000) that every creeper in the world has a Yahoo! account. It's like the Mecca for weirdos. Especially weirdos with creepy cat tail/penis avatars.
Knight: You're welcome.
Midwestern: Jesus, woman. Hide your lust at least a little!!
Opto: I know. They can't even spell 'liter' right.
Meleah: You so want me.
Sister: I LOVE IHOP.
Everything I say, I say out of love.
Eva: You should have seen me.
Dr.Cynicism: I'm really quite the role model, you're correct.
Justus: Christ. You want MORE?!
No pressure, though, dude. The fuck.
Jeremy: I often think the same thing about Scarlett Johansson.
Elly: You sound hot.
Kris: Welcome to my life.
Kage: Why..do we have to choose?
Gini: Um..you realize he got ME on Yahoo, right?
Of course you do.
Patty: Come on. You know you love the furry cat penis.
Just think, to your new friend, you are America.
Awww wish I was a yahoo friend of yours... maybe.
if you become close friends he might stuff a live midget in a box and fedex it over to you.... crazy EU dwellers
He's right, blogger sucks
Yeah, that cat avatar is just wrong. But admit it, you're kinda pissed that you didn't think of it first, aren't you?
I am not sure what is most disturbing, the images of midget penis or bente dude's avatar which to me looks like cat with a furry penis or am I just really really tired.
I don't know what to say about your exchange with little Jackie Chan. I'm at a loss for words. That's one weird conversation, Mr. Poo. I hope you're not killed by a Kung-Fu midget's hard-on a week from now.
hahaaa...funny shit.
moooog; you are not alone, i guess YIM is full of crazy people cause i got IMed out of blue too by a crazy chick yesterday. Its not funny as yours but it made my day. Have a look
http://steyny.blogspot.com/2010/11/craziest-chick-ive-ever-seen-ims-me-out.html
PS: i hope that won't count as advertising, i want u to read that shit ehehee
I knew I did the right thing of uninstalling Yahoo altogether when we got a computer for the kids!
Awww you made a new friend. Good for you! You are like the Ambassador to the European Union now. You know people in the embassy get away with murder right? So yeah practicing midget porn definitely falls within the guidelines. By the way the whole crawling into a penis to detect illness thing reminded me of David Sedari's new story "The Grieving Owl".
FINALLY, the guy's totally a fake European. I am 1.68 meter and I know I am 5'7". I am so happy you are still alive: He's most likely a Euro Serial killer.
European cats are clearly as suspicious as their European owners ;)
(P.S ~ Just found this blog & very much enjoying myself here! Thanks!)
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